Emie Persson~

Today time is going really slow..

Its maybe bcus im having this huge weight in my chest,

It started to grow yesterday when i was on my way home from my love.

The thing that caused it to grow even more was that my love wrote that he wanted to be alone for a while,

I respected his wish and knowing that he wanted to train with his work.

Of course i let someone be alone if he/she asks for it.

So i let him be alone.

its just that im sitting and counting the hours, from not hearing anything from him, and those dark thoughts are whispering to me: "he might have died, he could have forgotten about you, he hates you!"

How much im trying to ignore those thoughts they come back stronger and more violently..

 

The heavy part now:

My weight in my chest has grown bigger as i said before,and i have tried not to think of him, to loosen up the feeling, but everything i do reminds me of him, when i smoke, when i play WoW, and when i look at naruto, even when im eating food..

It feels like we have broke up our relationship,When i havent heared from him.

I do not blame him.

 

Its just that i feel so abandoned.

This is the worst part being in love:

The alone time..

He said that we should manage 2 months separeated,

its sounds really easy but i feel now that its gonna be a battle and alot of struggling from my side.

 

But i have to look on the bright side.

if something happened im really glad, i mean REALLY GLAD! that i was blessed by meeting that wounderful man.

And if nothing happened, the first thing im gonna do is tell him how much i love him <3

 

Gonna escape reality with booze and games now!

chuu~

/ emie